Choosing to lean into your emotions or story is the first step in getting unstuck. Once challenging emotions have been triggered, the key is to not resist them but to allow yourself to feel what it is that is coming up. You can consciously feel it for 30 seconds, five minutes, an hour or days. Realizing that this is even a choice, empowers you.
How is this different than being stuck in your story? If your intention is to stay locked in your story, it’s difficult to fully feel the arising emotions. Being stuck in the story is more about “this happened” or “that happened.” Leaning into the experience is a conscious process in which you fully feel your emotions. Let the anger, frustration, sadness, etc. have their time in the limelight.
Recognize the feelings. Greet them. And be with it all. Go deeper into the feeling, exploring its potential origins. Once you get there, you will know it. From a place of fully feeling all that has arisen, you can then choose an approach to help release these emotions.
Here is one thing you can try:
Sit quietly and allow yourself to feel your emotions. Tune into your breath, breathing in slowly and expanding your lungs. Breath in the feelings of anger, sadness, frustration, or whatever is that’s coming up for you at that moment. As you inhale, attach those feelings to your breath. As you breathe out, imagine those emotions releasing from your body with your breath. Do this for a few minutes until you feel more peace and less intense emotions.
Another technique you can try is to use positive affirmations—positive phrases that guide you to a new mental state.
I am safe and loved. Ultimately everything works out.
I am feeling (fill in the blank) and I love myself.
I am good enough just as I am right now.
Or choose something of your own that you would find affirming.
With regard to affirmations, I have found it effective is to set an alarm on my phone to go off every day at a set time. I tend to choose poignant times during the day like dinner time or early in the morning when I know I may benefit from embracing these positive thoughts.
There are many more techniques to help us feel our emotions, release them and replace them with more positive, affirming ones. To learn more and practice these techniques please join me along with other amazing women ready for positive change at my retreat in Apex, NC (near Raleigh) on July 16th.