I am grateful to have Nadia Miller on my team as program coordinator and thrilled she has joined my year-long Connected Mastermind program!
After hearing time and time again, how she is shifting and healing her life, I felt guided to ask her to share a recent personal celebration with you all. It fills my heart to hear how transformational this work has been for her.
Please enjoy what she has to say.
All You Need is Love
The holidays with family for me have historically been full of stress and anxiety stemming from not only the STRONG, differing opinions of very STRONG, different people (read: Catholic, Episcopalian, Muslim, Agnostic, Atheist, and Confused-that last one is me J) but also from my own perceptions and opinions of my family that came from years of hard-wired “stories” I had created. These stories were my own take on family members, family events, and interactions that had taken place between family members and me. They were my perceptions of how they made me feel, and what that meant about me as a person. These stories made me reactive to others and left me feeling impatient, anxious, irritable, angry and sad. My stories told me that I was not enough.
This year, I wanted the holidays to be different. I truly was tired of all the stress and yucky feelings and wanted my stories about my family and myself to change. Wayne Dyer said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” So this year, knowing 18 of us would be piled in close together for Thanksgiving dinner, I decided I was going to look at my family differently. I was going to see each one through the eyes of love and nothing else. What??!! How??!! I needed a plan!
Thankfully through Kristen’s classes, sessions, and her amazing weekend retreat, I have learned to love myself (most of the time) unconditionally which, as it turns out, is the key to loving others unconditionally as well. I have also learned that I can create the experiences and emotions I want to have through meditation/visualization/quiet contemplation/prayer (any of these words work here). My plan was to meditate about the holiday and create the perfect weekend in those meditations before it even happened.
I thought about how I wanted the holiday to go, the love I wanted to feel towards each person and how I wanted to feel driving home at the end of the weekend. I thought about what kind of daughter, sister, sister-in-law, aunt, mother, wife I wanted to be during that time. I was truly optimistic and excited for the holiday. I wanted to prove to myself that I could create whatever future I wanted to create. That I was in charge of my destiny and my happiness.
And I am happy to say that is exactly what happened. The usual situations and circumstances that in the past had caused me to feel irritated, frustrated and angry still occurred, yet I was not affected by them in the same way at all. I felt peaceful, happy and grateful for my family-just like I had imagined I would. I tapped into the love inside me and was able to see the love inside everyone else. No one there had changed except for me and the lens through which I looked at my family.
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” All you need is love-and an eclectic, opinionated group of friends and family to push you to become a better version of yourself!